Hey.
Sorry I haven’t written in quite a while. Adulthood just decided to come in and sweep me off my feet. The whole “searching for a career that’ll determine the next steps in my life” thing, ya know. That stuff.
Of course that, among a mixture of a bunch of different life drama comes into play, but isn’t that part of adulthood too? The whole pretty package?
Granted, although I’m an adult, I’m not to the “buying groceries after a 9-hour day at work because that’s the only time you have to buy them, kill me” part yet, but I’ll be there soon. Which, that’s another part of adulthood I need to work on, because buying groceries to me is getting a stack of frozen dinner meals, some bread, some lunch meat, maybe a couple hotdogs, and a tub of ice cream to hold me off for a few weeks. Let’s just say I don’t value variety as much as I should. Or, I’m just really lazy and can’t cook. Either of those two are appropriate answers.
My perpetual mood.
Plus I’m still in the college phase of just, going out to eat all the time – you want to know what I spend my money on? Food. Uh. Food again. Bills here and there. Maybe a video game every once in a while, but yeah, food. That part of my youth won’t be lasting much longer. Thank God though, for my wallet and health’s sake.
But hey, in the midst of all this, I did finally get a job (Am I true adult now?). I’ll basically be a digital student advisor, helping university kids figure out what to do with their classes, while also being a counselor to them.
Damn right.
It’s super exciting, because my main goal was to find something within education and I found it. Who else would be more capable to help college students when I was just one myself (ahem, and one that slaved over her work and knows what it’s like to give up mental and physical energy to be successful).
I’ll also be with the same students through their entire program, meaning I’ll be able to build a relationship with them over the years – How cool is that?
But really, me the first day in the office trying to keep my shit together.
Do you know how ready I am, year 3 in, to call up one of my students, and be like “Hey, yo Stacy, how’s classes. Good? Sweet, I always knew you’d kick some ass. How’s Brett doing? What? You guys broke up? Well man, he was a dick anyway, he doesn’t deserve you, Stacy. God speed.” – Boom. (Okay, I definitely won’t be able to talk like that, but hey, I’ll be able to loosen up once time passes, which is a nice thought).
Alright – so I’ve accomplished one of the first big steps in post-college adulthood. Get a career job. Now the next step – move out, then adopt my own cat (which is the most important thing anyway, screw the job or apartment).
But one of the biggest pieces in my head is this – How do I adjust to this upcoming lifestyle but still preserve myself?
By preserve myself, I mean that I’m worried about being lost in my work and future responsibility, that I will thus stop writing and doing art. Of course, I know I’ll have to find a balance, like with everything, but I’m pretty disappointed in myself; early this summer, I was on a roll with my artwork/writing, and as the job search got more bleak, I just stopped creating.
Me trying to figure out how I’m gonna make time for everything.
Now throw a 40-hour 5-day a week job in there too that will take at least three months to get used to, and bam, then what?
I think this is a huge deal for a lot of young adults transitioning into big career jobs after getting out of college. All of us have different hobbies or passions that fill our lives, and from what I’ve seen, a lot of people seem to give them up when life just rolls in.
“Oh yeah, I used to sing.”
“I used to play soccer.”
“I used to paint.”
I mean, I get it on some level. I get that we have to give things up to compensate for the lost time and energy, but at the same time, wouldn’t all that past time and energy spent on the things you loved go to waste if you just like it rot away? When you let yourself lose progress and interest, and eventually, that passion is gone?
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See, I know that some people are okay with that too – that those types of things are “in the past” now, and hey, maybe they’re on to new exciting life hobbies.
Just please don’t make your hobby your job (unless your job is your passion, right?) Because when life just becomes our job, what’s the point? Although, you have to be careful when your passion is your job too, because from what I’ve heard, it can take the passion away from it (so be careful!)
I know I’ll have to seek a balance. I’ll make time for art and writing. Because it’s me, it’s what I love and not a piece of myself I’m ready to give up.
I fear being on a hiatus for a bit longer, since I’ll be starting my job next week, but I’m writing this as an encouragement to myself and to all those out there in the same shoes as me. I know I’ve written about “fighting for my passion” a lot, but hey, it’s important.
Don’t give up on what you love because life comes knocking at the door, asking for the rent money. I know giving it up would be easier, but don’t let yourself lose that joy and wonder you’ve held onto for so long.
Me after making time to do what I love no matter what.
Put it into your schedule, make it a habit to give yourself time to do the things you love for yourself and for only yourself.
If I’m gonna be an adult with a job and an apartment and a cat to account for, I still plan to be a dreamer with paint on their face and creative vigor in their heart.
(A creative dreamer who will also have to learn to grocery shop, budget, make time to preserve their identity, and get Stacy a new boyfriend.)
Starting adult life soon? Leave a comment below and tell me about it!
With everlasting encouragement,
